Like most men, I learned rather quickly that being that nice guy wasn't the best of decisions. Then all of a sudden logic swarms back into reality and bad, once again, means bad.You see, I never saw being nice as a decision that needed to be made – I understood it as a state that naturally existed. Understanding why women go for those bad boys isn't difficult to understand.I didn't feel that I should go out of my way to be nice because I liked being nice. There are some women who want the nice guy because they understand that nice means good and not nice means bad. They aren't very open, keeping mostly to themselves – that's mysterious.
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She may believe she wants a nice guy, but in reality, she doesn't want a nice guy. He isn't looking for love because those who look for love quickly lose the whole bad boy flair.
The essence of a bad boy is isolation, carelessness, self-indulgence, selfishness and attitude.
When you put it this way, it's difficult to understand why it is that women go for these kinds of guys.
However, the role the actions that result from such personality traits play on the psyches of women is undeniable.
Bad boys seem more manly – which is an awful way to think as it teaches guys that being bad is more rewarding than being good. If he took her on a date then he might have even bought her flowers, paid for her meal, paid for her drinks, paid for the cab.
If being a bad boy gets you laid while being a nice guy gets you either ignored or abused, then guess which type most men choose to be. But only until he realized that the girl had absolutely no interest in him.
Because women see nice guys as being weaker than those who flaunt their “strength” – if you can call it that – they feel that it's okay to use them and then leave them hanging. She liked the free food and drinks, but not the guy who was paying for them. I believe nearly all women go through their bad boy phase – some earlier on, some much later. No woman has ever lived happily ever after with a complete bad boy. Because once bad boys settle down, they are no longer bad boys – they're nice guys. If a challenge isn't challenging, then it isn't a very good challenge to begin with. So maybe it's that the women who go after these bad boys don't actually want a relationship. A pseudo-relationship that is more flashy than anything else. They learn firsthand that bad guys are bad for them. Now she wants a nice guy who will love her, treat her with respect and spend time with her because he wants to.
I think every guy who ever started out as a good guy had their ass handed to them. Every guy at one point was silly enough to think that being nice to the woman he has feelings for is a good idea. You need a nice guy to settle down with because that's the only kind of guy who is willing to actually settle down. By making your relationship a challenge, you are literally making it difficult to be with a person. Relationships require a great storyline, with lots of drama and the constant possibility of loss – like in the movies. They realize that being treated as if they were worthless and spending most of their time either alone or feeling alone isn't part of the relationship they now want to have. Unfortunately for them, by the time they realize the mistake they've made, there are only assh*les such as myself left.
So the truth is, ladies, that you don't want a bad boy. You want to change that reckless, untamed man and you want to put a collar on him. A young writer, philosopher, and entrepreneur, Paul Hudson (@Mr Paul Hudson) has been writing for Elite Daily nearly since the start.